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Deputy Duffy
08-30-2007, 08:41 PM
Signs You Had A Bad First Date

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* Not only is she a little young, but you're sure that you used to date her mother

* You find out her real name is Vinnie, and you used to play little league with her

* She has a thicker moustache than you

* When you go to pick her up, her lawyer meets you at the door with a contract describing your duties and restrictions

* You jokingly ask her if she wants to go down to Atlantic City and get married. She then informs you that leaving the state is a violation of her parole

* Her bra and panties are wired to an alarm system

* You walk away from her front door with the roses you got her shoved up your ass

* You are the first guy that she's gone out with that isn't her cousin.

* At the end of the night she gives you a coupon that is good for a free shot of penicillin at the nearest clinic

* She beats the shit out of some guy for ****** fun of your hair cut

* You wake up the next morning with a wicked hangover. In the bed next to you is Janet Reno

* At the end of the night, you drop her off at her house, and her pimp is waiting there with your bill

* You wake up to find your loins covered with purple and green spots, with an intense itching in your left thigh

* She keeps staring at you all through dinner, then finally asks if you want to meet Satan

* She is better hung than you

* She constantly complains that her cat won't stop laughing at her

* She informs you that you can't go out again because her spirit guide doesn't like you

* She informs you that you can't go out again because her boyfriend doesn't like you

davesmistress
08-30-2007, 09:10 PM
hahahahhaha funny..thanks deputy duffy

freedom
08-31-2007, 05:04 AM
cute...I like it

g00ber
08-31-2007, 11:41 AM
some great ones in there, but who is janet reno?

jaguar
09-01-2007, 12:58 AM
hahahahahahahah
Good ones there.....lmao

wizardwriter
09-02-2007, 12:08 AM
goober- attorney general under pres. clinton- very butch and never did declare her sexual affiliation,
but let's just say ol' bill never hit on her, and I think she had monica first

frozen_north
09-02-2007, 09:43 PM
Oy!!!!

cactuscock
09-21-2007, 11:13 PM
here is another...

you got left with the check, still have your condums and she took your car ... hahaha