View Full Version : The 7 Kinds of Sex

08-31-2007, 11:12 AM
SMURF SEX: This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone and you both have sex until you are blue in the face.
KITCHEN SEX: This is when you have been with your partner for a short time and you are so horny you will have sex anywhere, even in the kitchen.
BEDROOM SEX: This is when you have been with your partner for a long time. Your sex has gotten routine and you usually have sex only in your bedroom.
HALLWAY SEX: This is when you have been with your partner for too long. When you pass each other in the hallway you both say "fuck you."
RELIGIOUS SEX: Which means you get Nun in the morning, Nun in the Afternoon and Nun at night. (Very Popular)
COURTROOM SEX: This is when you cannot stand your wife any more. She takes you to court and screws you in front of everyone.

And last, but not least...

SOCIAL SECURITY SEX: You get a little each month. But not enough to live on.

08-31-2007, 05:12 PM
hhhaha these are great...thanks

08-31-2007, 05:50 PM
That is great. Loved it

09-02-2007, 08:21 AM
Mmmkays certainly got a giggle.

09-02-2007, 08:29 AM
what is it if you get less then Soc Sec sex????

09-02-2007, 09:07 AM
You missed: NYMPHO SEX
PARALYZED SEX: When they can't move afterwards. AM EXPERT AT THIS......LOL
AFRICAN SEX- misisonary position

09-02-2007, 11:19 AM
Hmm.. courtroom sex is what I am aiming for .... still will be a while until it happens.... so in the meantime; wht I have is the Hallway one.
Or the one Freedom asked for :D (cyber sex is a nice alternative, though!)

09-02-2007, 01:06 PM
lol im sure someone will oblige you with that kristen.:D

09-02-2007, 04:55 PM
Hey goober, didn't hear anything mentioned about 'Monkey Sex'- So good you keep it a secret go into 'see no monkey, hear no monkey, speak of no monkey' mode
Pay-for-it-later Sex- following week you're standing in line at the clinic

Guess we better re-label this thread 'The Different Kinds of Sex'

09-20-2007, 04:39 AM
lmao, lol,

10-05-2007, 03:49 AM
LMAO great stuff! I definetely agree that the Nympho sex should be added to that ;-)

10-14-2007, 12:01 PM
Cowboy sex- you'll walk like you've been in the saddle for a week
Sailor sex- you get done and you still haven't found your sea legs
Couch sex- you're too lazy to get off the couch to do it, but what the hell a throw will cover up any stains, right?