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eddwalsh2002
04-01-2008, 01:37 AM
brought to you by the tourtued mind of the mstic i bring you my collection of written poems enjoy and comment any new onew will be posted on this thread\

The Dreamer


In the dreams before me,
There are many things to see.
The Past, Present, and Future float past,
Sometimes very fast,
Sometimes very slow,
But onward they still go.
I see people that I know,
They are images that I tow.
I hear of events that have been,
Even those conceved in sin.
I smell the present,
it is a putrid sint.
I taste the future,
I’m afraid it holds no cure.
I feel around the time line,
Everythimg I touch is as slick as slime.
Through my dreams it takes me,
I have no control of what is to be.
So here in my dreams,
I sit and hear the screams,
I smell the desease,
I taste the blood of a hero,
I see the death,
And finally.... I touch it with my breath.

eddwalsh2002
04-01-2008, 01:38 AM
A calling from the heart is hard to ignore
Even when the soul is bleeding and sore
Taking without asking for your permission
Making you believe in submission
Till the desires of your mind collide
With the morals and values you held inside
Breathing deeply the sent of sin
And the faults you find in men
Confusing your senses once more
Shaking you firmly with in your core
Love is not through with you yet
A new time and place has been set
Thoughts of caresses and kisses bring you to tears
Awakens again the old feelings and fears
Will he bring disaster like the last
Should you compare him to the past
Are your nightmares founded for this one
Or will he brighten your life better than the sun
Only time can tell you these things
Only chance can give you wings

eddwalsh2002
04-01-2008, 01:40 AM
Who are you? I wonder out loud
Your dark face lined with a heavy cloud
What are you? Friend or foe?
One cannot tell with your frown so low
Can you see me with your troubled eyes?
So intense & frightening full of your lies
Do you even care if they know?
How your past has buried you below
Are you aware of the denial you crave?
By letting it go is the only way to save
Is there more to see behind your mask?
What the price is to glimpse I’m afraid to ask
Really do I know you at all?
And I turn at my final call


Then whispered “ Mirror, mirror on the wall
Do I know this person before me the tiniest bit at all?”


Mystic Mind

eddwalsh2002
04-01-2008, 01:42 AM
Done now is my dreaming
Awake now I’m seeing
Someone I love dearly
Come to me sincerely
I take and hold her
She laughs and calls me sir
I hold on as she whispers nothing
I start thinking she’s something
I hope she loves me forever
She kisses me and I shiver
I hug her believing
Or am I still dreaming…….

davesmistress
04-01-2008, 01:42 AM
Those are very nice

Thanks

eddwalsh2002
04-01-2008, 01:43 AM
Drinking and thinking the nights away
Hoping and begging not to feel this way
Loneliness is a part of my life
Heaviness a part of my strife
Love seeking and searching is now a chore
Having sex, fucking, making out a bore
Passion dead, heart in pieces
Soul subsiding, thinking decreases
Alive yet dead in this fallen place
No longer wanting a part in the race
Expire tonight my withering dieing heart
Leave me my burdens with their shameless part
Awaken again with morning light
Pretend once more everything’s all right

emilyleanne
11-10-2008, 06:15 AM
very good thank you xx

jaguar
11-10-2008, 06:37 AM
Too much I have suffered
too much injustice to me.
Too much of the simple things,
that i never got to see.
Too much of the bitterness,
that dwelt inside of me.
Too much of the insults,
that weren't meant to be!
Because of narrowmindedness,
the truth could never be
seen beyond the discrimation,
to see the true version of me.

emilyleanne
11-10-2008, 06:45 AM
wow jaguar thats good xx

jaguar
11-10-2008, 06:50 AM
All true feelings, it's amazing, when you sit with yourself, how many emotions can hit you all at once when you think of your past. Especially one as varied as mine!

Brigit Astar
11-10-2008, 03:15 PM
I must tell you that your poem is far too general; it consists of generalities. For example, the first two lines: "Too much have I suffered/too much injustice to me." In what way have you suffered? What do you mean by injustice? How and what. To you, the feelings are real; they have significance; but to the reader, they are simply too general. You need to be specific. Your poem is too general and subjective.

Brigit Astar
11-10-2008, 03:22 PM
Check out Lady Raven's poem "Hush, Touch Me"

bigizzy
11-10-2008, 05:56 PM
wow, love them all eddwalsh2002, and yours too jaguar, all very good!

emilyleanne
11-30-2008, 01:30 PM
I must tell you that your poem is far too general; it consists of generalities. For example, the first two lines: "Too much have I suffered/too much injustice to me." In what way have you suffered? What do you mean by injustice? How and what. To you, the feelings are real; they have significance; but to the reader, they are simply too general. You need to be specific. Your poem is too general and subjective.

Brigit astar I am wondering if you missed the true meaning of eddwalsh's poem as your comment seems a little unjust