I stared into the mirror lost in thought, am I really going to go though with this? Could I really go through with it? My nerves were more then a little rattled as I took one last look in the mirror and resigned myself to the fact that my fantasy was about to come true. Shaking my head at my reflection, I laughed out loud. Resigned, really? For such a smart girl…
Adding a final spray of perfume to the back of my neck, I left the bathroom, turning off the light behind me before heading to the living area. Nervously, I wandered around the room, lining up the glasses, checking the ice bucket again (yep, still full of ice) and walked towards the bedroom, sliding the doors apart. Opening the bedside drawer, I verified (again) that I had everything we could possibly need was at the ready; a couple of toys (for kicks), condoms (non-icky tasting ones), lube (flavored and non), handcuffs (a bet is still a bet) and a g-string (not for me). Closing the drawer, I lifted the blankets on the bed and folded the covers back at an angle, which I immediately pulled back up.
Yeah, um, no.
Deciding there was no way in hell I could sit here and wait, I slipped on my heels, turned the lights in the bedroom down low, grabbed my purse, room key and headed to the elevators. Once the doors closed, I leaned against elevator wall as it made its way to the lobby and closed my eyes, desperately craving a cigarette, but aware that it was one craving that would go unfulfilled tonight. The only craving that would go unfulfilled.
Opening my eyes as the elevator came to a stop, I stepped out and entered the lobby, smiling thanks at a group of men who stood to one side to let me pass, my eyes lingering on one in particular. Blond hair and mischievous green eyes, smiling quite openly at me in return. This one I'd noticed (and drooled over) upon my arrival at the 5th Ave Suites the day before. Hmmm - well, if things didn't work out tonight, I was here for the weekend.....
My confidence restored, I walked into the restaurant, headed to the back where the lounge was and selected a quiet table in the far corner. It was visible enough that I could easily be seen from the street entrance, but far enough back where I would have the advantage of a first sighting. Enough time to hide if I lost my nerves, I told myself. Such a chicken shit I thought, laughing.
Within moments of sitting down, the waiter came over to take my order and even knowing better, I ordered a double whiskey & 7. Light on the 7, very light. The waiter returned quickly with my drink and a menu.
"Shall I run a tab for you" he asked, staring, none too discreetly, at my cleavage.
"Please". I said, "Will you charge it to my room"?
"Of course. Would you like anything else, something to snack on maybe" he asked, only just remembering where my eyes were located. I shook my head no, seriously, why on earth would I want to dull the buzz I intended on getting with something as silly as food?
"I'll check back on you in a bit then", he said, glancing once again at my breasts before walking away. Really, my own fault, but nice to know the shirt worked as intended.
Reaching for my drink, I took a healthy swallow, grimacing at the strong taste and glanced longingly at the pack of cigarettes in my purse; I have no problem not smoking when I shouldn't, but man, leave it to me to pick non-smokers for this little tryst! Taking another drink, I closed my eyes once again, berating myself for asking to meet here, in the lounge, instead of my room, then kicking myself for asking to meet at my hotel instead of some where else.
My idea of maintaining control, an illusion, but one I needed to cling to. This scared me, they scared me, for different reasons, but they scared me nonetheless.
My nerves begin to act up again as I remembered the last time I saw them; one, a brief hello, 7 months ago, the other, a good-bye, nearly a year ago now. Fuck, we'd been apart longer then we’d been together. To make matters worse, that was true for both of them!! What the hell was I doing?
Panicked at the direction of my thoughts, I grabbed my purse with every intention of high tailing it out of there as quickly as possible. I’d just put a "do not disturb" on the room phone, turn off my cell & apologize to them later!!
Searching the lounge for my waiter, my heart nearly stopped when I saw him standing at the bar, looking for me. Smiling as soon as his eyes met mine, he said something to the bartender, nodded in my direction and began to walk towards me.
Three seconds later, my heart did stop as the third member of my party walked into the bar, recognized me and also headed my way.
Fuck....no time to hide now..