You know when you are at work and unable to take a phone call, someone always takes a message for you, usually you return to your desk to find a post it type note with the message on it.
Here are I few which I found amusing.
Someone calling himself the 'High Wizard' phoned, saying you have broken your sacred oath and must pay the ultimate price....... No need to phone him back.
A journalist called, They are going to run 'THAT' story about you tomorrow, you may want to lie low for a while.
Your stolen laptop has been recovered, however the police want to ask you about some images they found on the hard drive.
Your made to measure PVC playsuit is ready to be collected, please confirm a time to avoid embarassment with Madam Stern.....